Daily Archives: May 27, 2007

The Divorce – Legal but Undesirable

Click here to read in Gujarati
Relatives have been gifted by the God by our birth in a certain family to His wish whether they suit us or not. But, we must thank Him in cases of our friends for whom we have at least a chance of choice. Wife is also like a friend and one has the opportunity for selection – preference – liking – loving, whatever you may call it. This openness is allowed for both love marriages and arranged marriages. There is not any kind of compulsion for friendship or marriage. The friend and wife are the new-comers in our life after our birth. The rest relatives are inherited and we have to accept them as they are or may be. Wife is a life partner and a partner of our ‘self’ also, and that is why there is a word ‘better half’ for wife in English.

Thus, a wise man is always conscious while choosing the wife and his first selection results as first and final. It is not possible for anybody all the times that he can observe every aspect of her quality or character like an article we purchase from a shop-keeper. Minor missing qualities can be shaped or compromised.

To change a wife like a neck-tie or shoes after marriage is possible for those only who do not value the dignity of a woman. Mother, sister, wife and daughter are the forms of a woman in particular relationships. Generally, it is observed that ‘wife’ is always criticized and the rest are accepted or tolerated. ‘Wife’ is considered as an imported commodity into our family, but the others are favored or considered as our own. Such is a partial attitude towards ‘wife’ and in such circumstances, the marriage results in failure; and sometimes an unpleasant situation of divorce arises. Divorce is allowed by state and religious laws in sensitive and justified cases, but it is disliked by the God. The Divorce, without justification, is a crime of society and the life time torture to the divorcee.

Marriage is like an animal drive cart or vehicle. Both husband and wife are harnessed to drive it with mutual understanding, co-operation and harmony for successful journey of life. But, we see all around the world in various communities that all marriages are not ideal ones all the times.

An interesting quotation in this regard narrates the outcome of marriage in this way : “ In few cases, marriage is a prize; in some cases, marriage is surprise; and in the most cases, marriage is disprize or punishment.” The words ‘few’, ‘some’ and ‘most’ are significant in this quotation. Now, it depends on us, in which category of word, we want to set our position.

Still, the topic of this blog continues with some questions; not for any answers, but to give a serious thought over. They are: Should all this not to be applicable to female also, particularly, when some western or western like people have granted equal rights to women? What about those poor fellows who become the victims of such disturbed family life with the weapon of divorce hit by the female? What about those compensations favored by laws to divorcees at the cost of dignity and self respect? What about those affected innocent children? What about their future and mental disturbances?

Just to make a peaceful society, the families will have to be peaceful. Just to decrease the family courts, the family counseling centers will have to be increased. Many countries of the world are worried for breakings of marriages and families. Day by day, the situation becomes the worst.  Good people want a change in the prevailing situation. But, who will tie the bell?

Read further, one more quotation of an unknown writer published in a Gujarati News paper and translated here for counseling to individuals as the remedy of being victorious over the cursed word – “divorce”:

“When I was 20 years old, I always used to say with the great zeal and force that I would change the entire world. But, gradually, it seemed to be difficult for me. Then I reached the age of 30 and changed my goal and minimized my territory from world to my country and the surrounding society. But alas! I couldn’t succeed. Today, I am on death bed and for the first time, I realize the eternal truth that, in fact, I had to change myself first since very beginning; and I could have seen the whole universe changed as I had wished.”

While winding up my blog post, I cannot restrict myself to give you one more and the last quotation regarding Love marriage. It is this: “Love marriage begins with attraction, passed through dejection and (perhaps) ends into separation.”

My good readers, wishing your married life meaningful, fruitful and helpful.

With regards,

Valibhai Musa
Dtd. :
26th May, 2007

Some pre-medical tests of Thalasemia, Hepatitis B, HIV etc. are essential for the health care of the couple as well as future generation. Prevention is better than cure.



Posted by on May 27, 2007 in Article, લેખ, MB


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Dr. Musa, Physician will be missed

Click here to read in Gujarati 

While playing tennis on Thursday evening on 7th July, 1994; Dr. Musa was stricken and on the spot, he breathed his last. It was the shocking news to all his own and numerous own like. His passing away was like the Sunset at Noon as he was to complete his 41 years on 25th Instant.anmusa.jpg

The Times News of July 11, 1994 offered tributes to the Late Dr. Musa with coverage of the above titled Report as follows:

“The news of the death of Dr. Alimohmad Musa, a staff physician of Palmerton Hospital, spread rapidly through the area on Friday. Dr. Musa, only 41, died from a heart attack while playing tennis on Thursday.

To many people, Dr. Musa was more than merely a physician. Patients attest that when they went to see him, he treated them special. No matter how busy he got, he never rushed patients out of his office. He answered questions in simple language that his patients understood, he explained all procedures, and he was always sympathetic to the patients’ fears and concerns. When a patient died, Dr. Musa was one of the first people to personally phone and offer sympathy to the family. He displayed characteristics we so often associate with the old-time doctors; good traits which appear to be rapidly disappearing.

He joined the staff of Palmerton Hospital in 1985. Peter Kern, hospital administrator, stated Dr. Musa will be mourned by fellow doctors, hospital staff, and friends. Kern added, “The loss will be felt most by many patients who have come to know him as a kind, caring, and compassionate physician.”

Dr. Musa’s practice wasn’t confined to Palmerton Hospital. He had his own office along Delaware Avenue in Palmerton. He regularly visited the Mahoning Valley Nursing and Convalescent Center and cared for patients there. His mild-mannered disposition as well as his ability to show compassion and understanding to his patients was one of his most glaring mannerisms. In a society where people are always in rush, this wasn’t so with Dr. Musa. He was a family man. He loved his family and never hesitated to talk about his wife and children when patients asked about them.

Not only did Dr. Musa take good care of his patients, he took good care of himself. He was tall, slim, and seemingly the picture of health. But tragedy did strike. While Dr. Musa was engaging in physical activity, a heart attack stole his life and robbed his family and his patients of one of the most decent, caring individuals you would ever want to meet. It will be hard for Dr. Musa’s shoes to be filled.

The patients who were treated by Dr. Musa are fortunate that they at least got to know him for a while; that they were able to enjoy the positive qualities he always emitted. Indeed, Dr. Musa was a very special person; one who will be remembered for the kindness and care he showed to his patients, his friends, his family, and his co-workers.

He will be missed. “

Edward J. Miller, M.D., President of Palmerton Hospital, expressed his feelings towards the Late’s family in these words:

“While vacationing in Virginia on Thursday, July 7, as my family and I were drifting near sleep at 11:00, the phone in our hotel room rang and as I got up to answer the phone I knew that something was wrong and that no one would have called us if there hadn’t been a problem. The last thing I was expected to hear was the tragic news about our colleague, Dr. Musa. After, Joy and I shed many tears in disbelief, a sleepless night followed. For the eight years that I had known Dr. Musa I did respect him as a colleague and most certainly remember him as gentle giant.

Gentle in the sense that he was truly a gentleman and giant in that he embodied and encompassed an intelligent, caring, and giving physician. I reflected that night of the many long hours on call, the endless nights in the hospital with little thanks, thanks only known to that of a physician. Ali had the presence of mind in the time of crisis and compassion in the time of defeat. Tragically, when he was enjoying his new home, and when he talked constantly of his children; a strange and cruel fate, death came to him.”

Further, by quoting a verse, he added, “However, we must remember that our lives were touched by a sensitive man who by his memories leaves us with a bit of light of help lift the darkness that we all feel. Here among us he had flourished and among us as a beautiful, strong young man died. If in the comfort of years to go by we look back and remember the tragic death of a young physician we knew then we will diminish Dr. Musa’s brief existence to just that. Rather, we must keep Ali alive in our memories in the things that we do and remember his laughter, his smile, his favorite things, and who he was and by doing so Ali will stay young and alive for many years to come.”

Afterwards, on behalf of the Medical staff, Dr. Miller announced to raise Dr. Ali Musa Memorial Fund at the Hospital and to place a plaque (tablet of metal) in an appropriate location in his memories.

Lastly, with a heavy heart, I shall quote few words of the Late’s patients – Richard Seidof and Bob (his wife) – “I thought some day, he would be by my bed; but, unexpectantly, he had gone first. Taking my aspirin a day, it reminds me of Dr. Musa – a fine and wonderful gentleman that came from India to be a doctor, and that he was in his prime; but suddenly was taken from his beloved family, friends and patients.”

Summing up, Sympathy is greater than gold. Gold comes from the earth, but sympathy comes from heaven. Heaven is above the earth and that is why sympathy is greater than gold. ( From an English Poem).

Here, I put an end of the story of the Late Dr. Alimohmad Musa spread over three continuous blogs, with assurance of many more William’s Tales to share with in future on various subjects.

Valibhai Musa
Dtd. 23rd May, 2007


Posted by on May 27, 2007 in લેખ, Humanity, Life, MB, Report


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