Monthly Archives: November 2010

(230) ‘Maturity’ – A Mail to a Female Relative Reader

Dear Beta (Daughter)

Wa Alaykum Salaam (Peace be upon you also).

I am sorry for the late reply. My gmail Id is main and generally, I check it regularly. Today, I came across your scrap book entries and reply you now.

I don’t consider your question as a counter-question, but it is as some curiosity and confirmation from my end. What you think is quite genuine, but nobody can define the word ‘maturity’ exactly. There are two aspects of maturity – (1) Physical (2) Mental. Sometimes, a boy or a girl at the very early age may show own mental maturity; and, in certain cases physically matured person may behave like a child. Thus ‘maturity’ is subjective and it cannot be generalized.

But, if we go to general tendency of people; your marking is perfect with variation of (+/- 2%). Present Marriage Act in India, clearly suggests that both male and female members must be over 18. In ancient times, life span of the human being was estimated 100 years and hence marriage was allowed after 25. As per Islamic laws, physical maturity (scientifically proved also) of a boy is 15 and girl’s only 9. Whatever it may be, but in general to say and I have already said in my some Article that at the ‘matured age’ one must marry without any delay for many reasons.

When we come to the custom of any community, there is no any hard and fast compulsion in this regard. Every individual and also family is independent to decide when to get a male or a female engaged or married. Where there is the question of career making, one may delay the marriage or even engagement to avoid any mental disturbances.

Now, if you can spare some minutes, you may go to my previous Article “Divorce – Legal, but Undesirable” for some further knowledge in this regard.

Lastly, not any advice – but my counseling is that you should concentrate fully towards your studies and leave the rest upon the time when it matures(!).

Khuda Hafiz,


Greater – double mother (Maa-Maa) (!)


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