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Tag Archives: Thought
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ઘણાં વર્ષો પહેલાં મેં કોઈક ગુજરાતી સમાચારપત્રમાં એક સમાચાર વાંચ્યા હતા કે ઈસ્તંબુલ (તુર્કી) ખાતે ‘બાળકોની શિસ્ત વિષયક વર્તણુંક પરત્વેનો માતાપિતાનો અભિગમ કે વ્યવહાર’ વિષય ઉપર એક આંતરરાષ્ટ્રીય સંમેલન મળ્યું હતું. ચર્ચામાં ભાગ લેનારા એક વક્તાએ સૂચન મૂક્યું હતું કે બાળકોને તેમની ગેરશિસ્તના પ્રસંગે ગુસ્સાના આવેશમાં આવીને શારીરિક શિક્ષા કરવાના બદલે તકિયાઓને લાકડી કે મુઠ્ઠીઓ વડે ઝૂડવા કે ખંખેરવા જોઈએ. મારા વાંચકો હળવું સ્મિત કરશે અને હું પણ કરી રહ્યો છું, પણ આ સૂચનમાં થોડુંક તથ્ય છે તો ખરું! અહીં ગુસ્સાની અભિવ્યક્તિ અને બાળકની સ્વમાનરક્ષા વચ્ચેનો મધ્યમ માર્ગ છે. ઉપાય મજાનો, પણ સાથેસાથે મૂર્ખાઈભર્યો પણ છે. જ્યારે આપણે સજા કરવા તકિયાને ફટકારતા હોઈએ ત્યારે, તોફાની બાળક તેના દાંત કાઢ્યા વિના રહેશે નહિ.
ઉપરોક્ત સૂચન ઉપરનું મારું ચિંતન મને પ્રોત્સાહિત કરે છે કે હું તેને એવી રીતે સુધારું કે બાળકોના બદલે તકિયા ઝૂડવા એના કરતાં તેમને તકિયા જ મારવા જોઈએ, એ શરતે કે તે નરમ હોય અને તેમને કોઈ ઈજા ન પહોંચે. આનાથી માતાપિતાના ગુસ્સાનું શમન થશે અને બાળકો વિચારશે કે તેમને સજા કરવામાં આવી. આમ તકિયો એ મહાત્મા ગાંધીના ‘સત્યાગ્રહ’ જેવા અહિંસાત્મક શસ્ત્ર તરીકેનું કામ કરશે! શૈક્ષણિક સંસ્થાઓએ તેમના શિક્ષકોને અન્ય શૈક્ષણિક સાધનોની જેમ તેમને તકિયા પણ ન પૂરા પાડવા જોઈએ? માબાપને આ ખાસ સુવિધા પૂરી પાડવી જરૂરી નથી, કેમ કે તેમની પાસે તો તેમનાં ઘરોમાં તકિયા હાથવગા હોય જ.
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In my previous Article ‘Depression’, I had mentioned that ‘Depression’ which is a negative state of mind leads the victim, sometimes, to commit suicide. It is needless to explain what ‘suicide’ is, even though I would write in brief that suicide is an act of putting an end of life by the person itself. When a person feels that the life is worthless or disgraceful due to certain problem(s) or blunders of own life, he or she wishes to bring a quick and permanent solution of misery by committing suicide. In spite of the problem being a very minor and temporary, it is granted as serious and also beyond any solution; and, as a result, the dreadful action of suicide arises. Here, the person collapses like a house falling by its own weight.
Life is the gift from the Creator to all living creatures of the universe just to live until the natural death catches them. Human is left free with its mental choice and physical power whether to live or die. The weak minded individuals, shocked with certain worst happenings in life, feel tired of life or victimized by some pains or miseries. But, the surprising matter is that the victim becomes victorious over the natural terrors of death and hurriedly tries to escape from the prevailing critical situation by disposing of own life. Normally, the human loves its own life more than any other thing; but, when it decides to commit suicide, the dearest life becomes hateful and the death attractive and savior from all miseries.
Bill Maher narrates suicide in typical words as “Suicide is man’s way of telling the God that He can’t fire him – he himself quits.” A very simple finding of the topic in discussion is that mostly living people live willingly because they are afraid of dying; and, dying people die by suicide because they are afraid of life. Here, we would have to think over the issue whether suicide is the reasonable and permanent solution of problems. Suicide is the backdoor of life to nowhere. By committing suicide, the person closes all doors of chance for happiness in life or solutions of problem(s) if it would have remained alive.We must not give up hope or give into despair because of our current situation. As long as we are still living in this world, there is a chance to take a different path from the one we have been traveling on.
In Hiduism, murdering one’s ownbody is considered equally sinful as murdering another. Christians believe that human life is sacred – a wonderful and miraculous creation of God and at any cost it must be tried to save and preserve as far as it is possible. A verse in the Holy Qu’ran of Islam clearly narrates as “And do not kill yourselves, surely Allah is most merciful to you.”(4:29). Ancient Roman law, just to discourage suicide attempts, punished to the dead body of suicide making person by being paraded naked through the streets. Some other ancient laws hanged the dead body of the suicide maker at public places for several days not to punish the deceased as it was meaningless, but to teach others the lesson for not going to the way of suicide.
Ideological arguments in this regard are such as – at such critical moments, the person has to pause, ponder, rethink and analyze own ideas and the events of the past; and should chalk out remedial actions for the future. But, Psychologists and Psychiatrists say that the person who has reached the climax of the action of making suicide is not in a mental position to review the situation. Even when many intellectual and matured persons have failed to avoid suicide, then how we can expect from any ordinary poor fellow like a daily wage earner to fight against any mishap or disgrace of life. But, let me quote here Mother Teresa in her words as “Loneliness and feeling of being unwanted is the most terrible poverty.”- to clarify that richness is not confined in worldly wealth or intellectual properties only. Just to make my point clear, I would give below some illustrations of few historical persons who became the victims of nervous breakdown or depression and committed suicide.
A foremost modern writer of Iran named Sadeq Hedayat ended his life by gassing and Cleopatra VII could not bear her defeat in war and committed suicide. Same way, Virginia Woolf, an English novelist drowned herself by weighing her pockets with stones and walking into the river. Sigmund Freud, an Austrian Neurologist and Psychiatrist who was suffering from mouth cancer being a heavy cigar smoker made Physician assisted suicide with over-doses of morphine. Alan Turing, a Mathematician and Father of Modern Computer Science made suicide with cyanide poisoning. Adolph Hitler, a German Politician committed suicide when Berlin was captured in World War – II by biting cyanide capsule and soon after with a gun shot. A very surprising matter is that he married with his lover, Eva Braun, just before 24 hours of his death and she also accompanied him to make suicide as he did.
Above illustrations are not at all intended to justify ‘suicide’ with the examples of the historical people. Freud’s case may be considered genuine as it was the merciful death, not a suicide. He had undergone to the surgery for about 30 times for the cure of his cancer and at long last he had demanded death. In my earlier Article “Mercy killing or Merciful death – A debate”, I have mentioned everything related to the subject. But here, our discussion is with the issue of ‘suicide’ and, to avoid it, the positive thinking only can be helpful. In severe mental state, one should seek professional help or online help on Internet rendered by some Organizations. When you are going to rely upon them, you have nothing to do but just to follow the instructions of the counselors. You should continue your contacts or sittings as long as you are asked for.
But, in normal depression, the positive thinking may be helpful to you to wipe off or reduce the thoughts of making suicide. These ideas are very common and practical also which do not need any scientific base. Religious minded people will surely admit that the life is God-gifted and one has no right to destroy it without any justification. Members of family and many other people connected with you with the threads of feelings have also equal right over your life. It is not a wise step to put them under disgraceful state because of you as they have to live yet long and those poor fellows would have to face the bitter comments and back-biting in the society aimed to your foolishness. “Deeper you think, deeper you will sink.” is necessarily to be remembered. You may imagine how it would look when you are hung in your room with tongue suspended and eyes widened. When you choose to redden the Rail tracks with your blood, imagine how your body would be cut into pieces with the wheels of the train moving fast. You may imagine such other alternatives of making suicide and bring the picture of pitiable condition of your body before your eyes. Many suicide makers firing themselves are heard shouting loudly for a savior. These are some points demanding a serious thought over the issue.
Generally, the people determined with making suicide are found having their foolish presumption that they alone are in the most tragic situation of life and the rest in the world are safe and sound. But, reality is that all are, less or more, in trouble. All have to bear their own loads of pains themselves connected with their own lives. It is a selfish idea that the whole world should stop and suffer with you! It is a wrong expectation that the world should cry for you and cry with you! Each individual has its own problems and one has to solve one’s own problems. Suicide is not the ideal solution of the problems. Have you ever heard that any bird or animal might have committed suicide? Human is a specialized creation of God and he has been gifted the power of thinking. These are the critical moments where the person has to select either death or life. Here is the question of ‘to be’ or ‘not to be’.
One more positive thinking to motivate you in right direction is that the person should bring the faces of own dear ones in memory and particularly the face of one’s own mother. We should remember that she had kept us in her womb for nine months. While giving our physical birth, she was racked with a lot of labor pains. She had brought up us in her lap and had taken all cares to make us happy in all respects. Had she ever imagined that her child would accept the defeat and bring tragic end of life with such a cowardly act of suicide? Whether she might be alive or deceased, her pitiful eyes shedding tears will surely turn us back from the way we have chosen.
Summing up, I would like to express my feelings of satisfaction that if any one of my Readers may get inspiration from this Article and be the life-savior of at least a single person, I think, my efforts in this regard have been rewarded.
Thank you very much,
– Valibhai Musa
Dtd.:February 18, 2008